First, a little exercise. Place an object on the floor in front of
you. Now, TRY to pick it
up. Repeat. Obviously, either you pick up the object or
you do not pick it up. For our purposes,
“try” has no meaning.
So,
when it comes to happiness, either you choose it or you do not. “But wait, George, of course I want to be
happy, but don’t you understand how hard it is right now?”
And
the point is…? “I can’t let myself be
happy until so-and-so gets her act together, or brother gets a job, or, or, or
a LONG list of things that have to happen before I can relax and
enjoy myself."
My
question is: Is there ever a point in the future when you would allow yourself to be
happy? “Sure. Some day.
Maybe. Hopefully when I die…” Now that’s a bummer – got to “die” in order
to be happy!
Somehow
I think we’ve gotten a bit confused about being Happy. Happiness is not an achievement. It is a state of Being. That's not to mean that "doing
stuff" isn't fun and joyful - it can be.
The measure is how you feel
before and during the activity. Are you
excited? Anticipating it? Energized?
If so, then your activities, and thus your achievements, are part of
your happiness.
Now,
if you feel "obligated" to do something, or you dread doing
something, or you postpone doing something, then your feelings are alerting you
that something is out of sync. You can
do whatever it is, but you will not en-joy it – it’s not a part of your
happiness. Granted, your actions may
please others, and that's good, but if pleasing them is the only way you can
feel good and en-joy your life, then your experience will be jumble of highs
and lows with many lows.
Happiness
does not come from external situations, conditions, or people. You decide whether you are happy.
Like picking up the object, either
you are happy Being or you are not.
Happiness
is
wherever you are
doing
what ever you are doing
at
any given moment.
So,
who decides if you should be happy, and what’s best for you?
On
one side are folks who answer quickly:
“I decide if I am happy.” On the
other side are folks who answer quickly “I decide if you should be happy.” It’s easy
to see why there appears to be so much struggle and angst – those two positions
are polarity – opposite ends, and as such, repel each other. Which are you?
Are
you choosing to be happy? Or, are you
waiting for someone or something else's approval
or permission in order to “feel”
happy?
What
we call happiness is another way of describing a dominant feeling or emotional
state. It’s on the high frequency end
towards JOY, which appears to be as delightful a state of being as we can
manage at the moment in our spiritual evolution. We equate JOY with LOVE.
People
often describe their happiness in terms of loving and being loved. Indeed, we do feel happy when we are loved
and we feel happy when we love. This is
unconditional love, no strings attached.
That which we call Love cannot have conditions or strings for if they
are present, it is not love, but something else.
I
like to substitute the word APPRECIATION for Love. They are virtually synonymous. Yet when we appreciate someone or something
there's no "exchange" necessary - what are you going to do for
me? Appreciation is just that - a
positive, uplifting, joyful feeling of enjoying the focus of your
appreciation. Simple.
Sometimes
folks fuss about how silly this concept is - "Choose happiness" or
choose whatever and it'll happen. They
don't believe in magic. Me neither. It's not magic. It's physics.
You know how it works because you choose and create your experience
every moment.
An
example: You decide you would enjoy
dining out. You make a decision that you
will go out to eat and at once you begin drawing to you all the resources necessary
to create that desire. You select a
time, you choose what restaurant, you may invite a friend or someone who you
believe would enjoy dining out as much as you.
You determine the means of exchange for the meal (a.k.a cash, credit,
debit card), and time passes, moving you closer to the event. And then you go out to eat - having
determined how you would get there physically - you drove your car this time.
This
is creation, this is how it works. You do
it constantly and you’re good at it.
What we often miss, is that we can create our level of joy, our
experience, just as easily as we can create a dining experience, or shopping
experience, or going to work experience.
Finally,
consider the word Enjoy. Enjoy and happy
are twins. If you enjoy something, you’re
happy. If you’re happy, you enjoy. Add a hyphen and you have EN - JOY. En meaning to bring together, to cause, in
this case, the feeling of joy. When you
enjoy something you bring together your experience (or observation) with
Joy. The hyphen is your decision, your
choice, your desire.
En-joy
the day. Choose happiness. I mean, you are free to choose whatever you
wish. Why not be happy?
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